5) Addicted

Somebody asked me today if I am addicted to certain substances.

That’s a kind of a personal question. Not many people would answer that honestly, I think. Addiction is a hard topic to talk about and there are a lot of things you can be addicted to.

I, for one, think people can be addicted to make-up. What’s the point of wearing make-up, anyway? You’re literally putting on a mask. True beauty comes from the inside and shows off to the outside. It’s hard to mask it well if you’re insecure about yourself.

Other people can read it off your body language if you’re insecure. There is no amount of make-up products that’s going to help then. That’s why I think beautyblogs are made in vain, most of the times. If you want to help people, help them be more beautiful on the inside and the outside will come by itself! Help them find a hobby or something! But that’s my opinion.

I was secure enough today to answer the addiction question honestly. I don’t need fitness machines anymore to make me feel secure. I don’t need power lifting, jogging, buying the lastest gear or telephones. I just sat there with a smile on my face and thought about the duality of the question.

I was able to answer the question of addiction honestly. What I said, was:

Yes, I’ve used drugs in the past. But now, I’m addicted to fruit. I’ve even made a website to tell people about it.

The woman who asked me the question laughed at me with her eyes. It was a beautiful shine, even though it reflected the light of a computer screen. LED light is a notoriously ugly light to paint. It’s kind of blue-ish. But still, the twinkle in her eyes was beautiful because it reflected something deep in her that came out.

It was a thing that said ‘Man, I wish I had the amount of energy that that guy has’. We clicked and had a pretty open, honest conversation after I’ve admitted my addiction.

I ate two pears and two kiwis while I was cycling to the meeting. I think I can thank those four pieces of fruit for getting me through it. It was supposed to be a loaded conversation, but I turned it into something pretty light-hearted. I even drew a picture of two badminton players while we were conversating and I read off her open, relaxed body language that she enjoyed me drawing.

I’ve had my seven pieces of fruit for today after the two grapefruits that I’m going to have after writing this post. Hell, I’ll get them now and I’ll tell you about how I was addicted to grapefruit juice while I was in high school.

When I was around 15, or 16, I had one of those rebellious phases where I would drink mainly grapefruit juice. I remember they sold them per litre at the local supermarket. In yellow packets.

I used to drink at least one pack a day. Sour that it was! But it would help me wake up in the morning. I used to be notoriously slow in the mornings. I still am sometimes.

I used to oversleep all the time. School started around 8.30, but I used to wake up after 9PM more than once. Sometimes, it even was after 10PM, or 11PM! This really affected how well I did at school. I think it’s one of the reasons for not having a university degree at 24. It’s okay. I’ll get one, later.

This is while I now find that the most beautiful things happen in the morning. When I wake up early, my brain works better, I’m more active, I hear the birds singing and my mood sings along with it. When I feel well-rested, I feel like there’s a day to tackle, and I feel good tackling it. I tackled some slam poetry when I was cycling home through the woods. I sang out loud.

What a difference with when I wake up after 9PM! I’ll be groggy, lazy and slow-moving. I just want to stay in bed and watch Netflix all day.

7AM is the best time to wake up for me. Maybe even a bit earlier. I sometimes read about people who wake up at 5 or 6, but that’s too early for me. I need my eight hours of sleep badly.

But I’ll stick writing about grapefruit juice. It would ‘help me’ wake up every morning. Just like most kids these days drink carbonated energy drinks to ‘help them focus’, while the drinks are filled to the brink with caffeine, I used to drink grapefruit juice. All the sourness could have been damaging to my teeth enamel, when I think about it. But that’s always when you look back at it.

At least it was fruit-based, and not sugar-based. But to be honest, I’m not 100% sure how healthy drinking a litre of grapefruit juice a day is.

I used to bring the packets into school and drank them in the breaks. I spread out a litre over a day. But there were some days when I chugged them. A litre in 30 minutes. You might think ‘Ew.’. I think back about it with a smile. High school was a good time for me, in multiple ways. I peaked early.

When I used to drink a lot of grapefruit juice, I liked the kick of it being a bit different, and of the sourness that would wake my sleepy head up in the morning. I liked the juice because it wasn’t mainstream.

You would think eating fruit is mainstream, but it’s not as common here as you would think. You would think that, for all the health benefits fruit provide, there would be filled fruit bowls in every house and on every meeting table.

You would think people would the daily cookies and cake with fruit. But that’s not the case yet. I want to live in a world where the eating of fruit is so widespread that fruit will be everywhere. It depends on the fruit you eat, but they can be so BIG and JUICY!

I’m glad that I replaced my grapefruit juice addiction, which is probably an addiction to a juice not 100% made of grapefruits, but with added sugars and ‘tastemakers’ with a real fruit addiction.

What are some positive changes that you’ve made in your life? What are some things of which you think “Wow, I’m glad I don’t do that anymore. I’m glad I replaced that habit with another habit!”

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